Gardening

Have you ever thought about how beautiful and complicated a garden is? In order to even have a garden, you must till the soil, right? Of course! If you don't, you will have a mess.

Observe the large stones below that we dug up out of our garden plot.

While plugging away to root up the weeds that had overtaken our plot, we also ran into these massive stones. As we dug everything up, we talked about how our hearts are very much like a garden, just like is mentioned in the Bible in Matthew during the parable of the soils. (Matthew 13:3-23)

Then my husband mentioned that the stones we were digging up were like a picture of things we hold in our hearts that are not pleasing to God. (e.g. rebellion, lust, pride, fear, lying, etc) And while I had already been thinking that, I began to dwell on this notion more.

You see, I joined a 12-step Christ-centered program that helps you address your hurts, habits and hang-ups back in February 2019. In October 2019, I joined a step study where they help you go deeper and actually ask yourself the tough questions. Going into the step study, I already knew that I struggled with a lot of things. I had already felt large stones taking up room in my heart and that bothered me tremendously.

If I could do anything to get rid of these stones, then I would. And I did everything I could, but you know what? It did nothing. It wasn't until I surrendered my power, my will and my wayward heart, that God began to show me where stones were buried in my heart.

I started the hard work of digging them out, but it seemed fruitless. When I was literally in the garden on my hands and knees yanking stones out of our plot, I started getting discouraged. The more that I dug, the more stones I found. I suddenly felt attacked because of what my husband had said. I was the only one digging up the stones and not just stones, but very large stones. Was this a literal picture of my own heart's condition? It was disheartening.

At one point, I realized that I was trying to have an absolutely pure plot of soil ready for growing things in. I quickly reminded myself that this was impossible. This made me wonder if I was acting the same way toward the stones in my heart. I had become discouraged and chosen to stop digging further. But just like I cannot have a perfectly tilled garden plot, my heart will not be perfectly tilled and empty of stones.

My husband encouraged me as he shared with me his thoughts about our hearts as gardens. He said that we tend to think that seeds are too fragile too deal with the remaining stones and weeds that they must grow around, but life finds a way.

God is planting in my heart and He is caring for the seeds. He is allowing growth to happen in my heart despite the stones and weeds being there. He is making miracles.

While I'm on this earth, I will always be fighting my selfish nature and my fleshly tendencies. And this is okay. God doesn't ask for perfection, He asks for obedience and faithfulness.

So here is what I resolve to do. I will cultivate faithfulness and goodness in my heart. I will do my best to dig up weeds and stones as God reveals them to me. I will not be too hard on myself. I will not give up on the work that God has already started in my heart. I will trust that His life can flourish through me despite all of the remaining mess.

"Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He will do it. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light and your judgement as the noonday." Psalm 37:3-6